Day 9

It's Day 9.

Things got a little rough last night and a "Miss you..." text wiggled its way out of me.

I didn't get a real response from it, but I didn't expect to.

Still sucks.

As for my living situation:

It's been good to see Amy again. We've had our issues with each other, but I don't even remember what any of those issues were about anymore. She's pulled through for me, and I couldn't thank her enough.

She's living with a roommate. His name is Justin and he's definitely a player. We get along well-enough; when he's sober. When he's drunk he's kind of an asshole and does some pretty stupid shit and is a bit of a creep, but he seems to be a decent guy at least.

The apartment is cluttered, desperately needs to be swept, and the plumbing has got some serious issues but it could definitely be worse. It's got nice hardwood floors that look really pretty if you let some sunlight in. It gets cold at night and there's not much to eat, but Amy's a poor college student so it's completely understandable and it's really not bad. I can go out on the little deck to smoke and there's plenty of grass out front to take Boo out. There's a vegan cupcake shop literally right across the street that I haven't had the chance to check out yet, there's a bus stop right outside, a TRAX station on the corner and a Jimmy John's right down the street. It's a great location.

I'm going to get school stuff taken care of on Monday if at all possible and start going to SLCC to at least get my generals done. They don't have much in the way of classes, but if I just declare an english major or something then I should get grants and I can just focus on getting generals out of the way.

It feels good to be getting back on my feet; if "back" is really an appropriate word. I'm not really sure if I have ever been truly on my own feet. Yes, I'm getting help from Amy right now and I very greatly appreciate it, but what I mean is that I'm doing this for me. I'm focusing on improving my life. I'm not worried about having someone in my bed at night. I'm worried about where my life would be if I had stayed on the same track... So I'm switching tracks and putting away my hitch. Haha. I'm not in this to hitch up with someone else and make them happy. I need to make me happy and figure out my life - to the extent that anyone can really figure out their life - and if I get to the point where I've established who I am and I find someone who's established who they are and we have some kind of chemistry together, then I'll consider hitching up.

Until then, I'm not worried about it.

I've got bigger fish to fry.