Too Tired

I'm too tired to really type much tonight, but I figured I should at least type something. I'd like to challenge myself to post here every single day, but I don't know if it would happen. We'll see.

I've been struggling really badly lately. I think I'm getting sick, which doesn't help, but I'm pretty sure I'm slumping down into being depressed... The real kind of depressed that doesn't seem to have any reason at all, but that makes you feel absolutely awful and keeps you from functioning like a contributing member of society.

Sara and I talk a lot. I think she may possibly entertain the idea of taking me back, which makes me really fucking happy. It's also kind of scary as well as thrilling sometimes. I mean, she's pregnant. She's going to have a baby in August. Of course I'd be ecstatic to help her raise the baby, but that brings on all kinds of parent worries, you know? Like... Would I make a good second mom? Would I be a bad influence? Would I be too controlling? That kind of stuff.

Mostly I just want to take care of Sara. I want to treat her like the princess she deserves to be treated as.

Anyway, my thoughts are all scattered little wisps and my brain is all fuzzy, so it's bed time. Goodnight.

Here's Sara's first baby bump picture:

14 Weeks

God damn.

This is the scariest, most exciting, most confusingly amazing time in my entire life.